the incredible shrinking woman (with any luck)

So I've done something I never ever thought I'd have to do... I joined the Weight Watchers. My job offers weekly meetings right in the building plus 50% reimbursement so I'd be silly not to take advantage. It's a shocking development because, growing up, I was always the skinny kid. There was a time when I was too skinny, in fact. While I don't want to return to the gaunt, emaciated look, I am in mourning for my old metabolism and will power.

However, I've decided to stop reminiscing about what once was and get my ass in shape. First order of business was controlling my intake of food and alcohol. Actually, I don't eat an unhealthy amount of food. It's the type of food that's the culprit -- quick and easy and usually some sort of pasta involved. And my love o' the beer is no secret. Behold!

That classy snapshot was taken a few years ago at The Lovely Jess's 30th birthday party. Alas, there will be no more of those shenanigans. I'm allowed 24 points a day, according to Weight Watchers. Ain't no way in hell I'm blowing all of them on Brooklyn Lager. Although, it would be nice...

I went to an orientation on Friday and have been measuring and calculating ever since. Actually, I technically went to my first meeting last Tuesday but it was already week two and I hadn't a clue about the difference between the Core and Flex Plans so I just minded what I ate for three days and then got my jiggly ass to an actual Weight Watchers center so I could officially start counting points. My weight loss so far has fluctuated between 2.5 and 5.5 pounds. Today's scale read the latter number so that's what I'm going with.

It's pretty easy to follow and it makes me mindful of portion control. Even better, I'm not all resentful of being on a diet because I can still eat what I want. I just can't cram as much as I want in my face with nary a second thought. As long as I plan accordingly, I'm good.

My healthy eating kick will get that much easier starting tomorrow because I'll be taking advantage of the aforementioned lovely Jess's fledgling personal chef business. I'm going to be among her first clients. She's got my menu posted on her site. Check it out. More importantly, hire her! She makes yummy food. Her food hasn't made me puke or given me diarrhea not even once.

Jess, if you're reading this (and I know you are), feel free to quote me when you print up literature and/or launch your new website. That's a ringing endorsement if there ever was one, no?