i have arrived!

I got my first piece of angry hate mail, everybody!!! You know, I always thought I'd get an email bitch slap from some humorless dyke who didn't quite care for my jabs at the Sisterhood (see here and here). But it seems that most people are in on the joke and recognize that I'm a self-loathing lesbo who means no harm. You get that, right? RIGHT?!

I even thought that some rabid fans of The Tesh or The Hoff might take umbrage with my not-so-lovable tweaks of their idols. Or others might have been miffed at my insinuation that something crawled into Jeff Goldblum's mouth and died. Or some fans of Peppermint Patty might have been up in arms that I called her the c-word.

In other words, there's plenty of bile-fueled rants in my archives that could have gotten me in trouble. But little did I realize that my take on The Coreys, of all things, would warrant this missive:

--------------------
From: theGonnies_toddler
To: curly mcdimple
Date: Jul 23, 2005 8:23 PM
Subject: heyy,,, i love ur site!! =D

hi my name is u shouldn't fucking care.... but just to tell u i like corey feldom and corey haim there fucking awsome ..!!!!!!!1 there the best !!! and there so fucking hot!!!! .... hahaha.... this thing u wrote about them is telling me tht u have no life ... like come on... please people who fucking spend time doing an atricle about ppl tht they don't like anymore b/c there old or whatever the fuck! have no life u and all those sons of bitches tht wirte this shit .... like holyy fuck can u just leave them alone..... let them be! like seriously .. if u did have a life u would have never done this in the first place and u think corey haim is a loser ... who do u like britney fucking spears??? one thing NO ONE FUCKING CARES WHAT U HAVE TO SAY ABOUT OTHER PPL !!!! ... i bet if i made a website about u saying all this shit and more stuff tht i personally made up about.... u wouldn't like it one bit.... most of the things the media says is fucking lies!!! ...i would go on but ur probley at a point to cry b/c u just realized u have no life!!!

sinserly, , , from me =D

--------------------

I really need not say anything about this tool since the email really speaks for itself. Although, from what I can tell thanks to the wonders of Statcounter.com, theGonnies_toddler is from Canada. Say... doesn't Corey Haim live in Toronto? Hey, Toronto is in Canada! Just a thought...

I'm particularly amused by theGonnies_toddler's threat to create an anti-Curly McDimple website. That might concern me if I thought this moron was capable of writing something legible. Sure I was "at a point to cry" but I assure you those were merely tears of frustration as I tried to decipher the baffling Tard Code.

Ah, fame.